New excerpts from Nashville Covenant school trans shooter Audrey Hale's diary come to light
The document exposes the disturbed mind and cold calculation behind the shooting as well as revealing obsessive and self-destructive thoughts that culminated in the tragedy.
A Tennessee newspaper published new excerpts from the diary of Audrey Hale, who was responsible for the shooting at Covenant School in Nashville that resulted in the deaths of six people just over a year ago.
This Tuesday the Tennessee Star and its editor-in-chief, Michael Patrick Leahy, revealed 90 pages of writings attributed to Hale, who perpetrated the deadly shooting on March 27, 2023. In the attack, three nine-year-old children and three staff members lost their lives before Hale was gunned down by police. The documents released, written between January and March 2023, offer a haunting look into Hale's disturbed and twisted mind in the months leading up to the attack.
A diary of despair
The writings, legally obtained by the Tennessee Star in June 2024 from a source familiar with the investigation, were recovered from Hale's vehicle by the Nashville Metropolitan Police Department. The diary of the woman, who identified as a man, reflects Hale's internal struggle.
The first few pages of the diary reveal an anguished mind, with phrases such as "everything hurts" and mentions of "darkness," followed by statements of hopelessness such as "nothing on Earth can save me" and "endless pain." Hale, who used the name Aiden, described his desire to die, his rejection of religion and a distorted belief that his brain "doesn't work right" because "I was born wrong."
Obsession with love and identity
The diary also shows a fixation with love, particularly with "brown girls," as well as confusion about his identity. Hale, expressed deep disdain toward his biological body and frustration at not being able to change it. In several entries, Hale fantasized about having a male body, going so far as to graphically and disturbingly describe sexual acts.
Hale describes brown love as "the most beautiful kind," but also expresses his distress at feeling trapped in a body that he says does not match his gender identity. The diary reflects a deep rejection of the gender he was born with, and hatred toward his own religious beliefs.
Planning the attack
As the day of the shooting approached, Hale began meticulously planning the attack, obsessing over details such as the exact date. In a January 16, 2023 entry, Hale discusses choosing the date of the attack, insisting that it must include the number "27" or "17." Hale also expressed his desire to die as an infamous shooter, and mentions having been inspired by the perpetrators of the Columbine massacre, Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold, in the hope that his own attack would make them proud.
A final glimpse into Hale's mind
Hale's last day, March 27, 2023, is marked by a mixture of nervousness and excitement. In his final entry, Hale wrote: "The day has finally come! I can't believe its [sic] here. Don't know how I was able to get this far, but here I am. I'm a little nervous but excited too. Been excited for the past 2 weeks." These words reflect the cool determination with which he prepared to commit the attack.