Episode #78

Technology and emotional health: What every family needs to know

We spoke with expert Cindy Montoya about the impact of technology, social media and screen time on the emotional health of children and teens.

Published by

Barbara Migliore

3 de agosto, 2026

Topics:

In this episode of "Vivas y Plenas," Flor Elena Robledo talks with Cindy Montoya, a specialist in mental health and emotional well-being, about one of the issues that most concerns families today: the impact of technology, social media and screens on the emotional health of children and teens.

We live in an era where our children are more digitally connected than ever, yet often more disconnected from themselves, their families and real-life relationships. That's why learning to navigate this world with wisdom, balance and practical tools has become essential for every parent.

The real problem isn't technology, it's disconnection

For Cindy Montoya, technology is here to stay: it makes life easier and faster, and it makes no sense to try to block it "like the sun with your finger." The problem arises when screen time begins to replace basic human needs: getting to know one another, connecting, learning and sharing in person.

To put the problem into perspective, Cindy suggests a simple exercise: if a teenager spends four or five hours a day in front of a screen or playing a video game, that adds up to about 100 hours a month and roughly 60 days a year—nearly two of the 12 months of the year, devoted solely to a screen.

Nearly two of the 12 months of the year, devoted solely to a screen.Cindy Montoya

Why bans don't work

According to Cindy, many parents feel guilty about "delegating" their children's time to a tablet or cell phone, especially when workdays are long—something very common in Hispanic families, where it's not uncommon to hold two or three jobs. But the solution isn't to ban or remove technology from the home—it's to genuinely engage with it.

Cindy shared a personal experience: when her son invited her to play a basketball video game, she didn't know how to use the controls, and the game ended up taking much longer than planned. Even so, in the end, her son thanked her for playing with him. "It's not about isolating them from technology, but about joining in on what they're already doing," she explained.

The risk of desensitization

One of the points Cindy emphasizes most is the importance of identifying what kind of content children are consuming. Constant exposure to violent video games can lead to desensitization to others' pain, diminishing the capacity for empathy. According to the specialist, studies on various school shootings in the United States have found prolonged consumption of this type of content among the profiles investigated, though she clarifies that playing a violent video game does not automatically turn someone into a violent person.

When isolation is more dangerous than the screen

Cindy also pointed out that, even if a child is playing alone in their room, they are generally not truly alone: they are connected with other people online, often strangers to the family. She shared the case of a pair of teenagers she worked with who used to log on in the early hours of the morning to play with other gamers. During those hours, some kids would share very personal details with strangers online—from their parents' divorce to suicidal thoughts—while their own parents slept, unaware of what was happening.

The digital world feels real

For teenagers, the life they build through an avatar can feel just as real as their physical life. They have an identity, they socialize and in some cases, they even spend or earn money within those virtual worlds. Cindy shared the case of a teenager who decided to sell her body to get money to participate in an event within a virtual world. When the situation came to light at her school, the young woman was judged by her peers for what had happened in the digital realm—the pressure proved too much, and she ended up taking her own life.

If this issue affects you or your family, you're not alone. Talking about it openly, seeking professional support and keeping lines of communication open with your children can make all the difference.

The risk of online predators

Another red flag Cindy shared is the way certain adults pose as children or teenagers on gaming platforms to gain kids' trust. Through this "friendship," they end up learning about the child's routines, schedules and times when they are home alone. This information, in some cases, has led to that "friend" physically showing up at the child's home.

When does it become an addiction?

Cindy defines a "gamer" as anyone who plays between two and three hours a day. When that time gets out of control and begins to interfere with sleep, school, work or family relationships, it ceases to be a hobby and becomes an addiction, comparable to any other dependency.

A personal example: Cindy's own son, after a couple of months with a new console, confessed to her that the game was causing him anxiety he couldn't control. Instead of simply taking the console away from him, the family decided to return it to the store together and turn the experience into a shared learning moment.

Practical tools for families

Among the tips Cindy shared in the episode:

Create a family "hour inventory" that balances screen time with real social and family time.
Remove cell phones and tablets from bedrooms at night.
Have a single shared TV in a common area, rather than individual screens in every room.
Choose content and apps with positive values as an alternative to violent games.
Prioritize quality time over quantity: sports, family activities, community and faith.

The real antidote: Human connection

For Cindy, the antidote to isolation isn't prohibition, but genuine human connection. Children and teens who participate in sports, community activities or faith-based settings tend to be better protected against digital isolation. As she summarized in the episode: "Whoever reaches those hearts and little minds first dominates our culture." That's why being intentional parents—present, informed and genuinely connected—is the best tool against the risks of the digital world.